A comic spoof on the American television series Miami Vice written and produced by Stephen Gray about two undercover detectives who are sent in to investigate a ‘house of ill-repute’ at Winlaton Mill near Gateshead in Tyne and Wear. Filmed in the filmmaker’s own home the production features as its cast Stephen's work colleagues from the Environmental Heath Department at Gateshead Council. In the doorway of 19 Noel Terrace three young women in suggestive outfits holds the films opening...

A comic spoof on the American television series Miami Vice written and produced by Stephen Gray about two undercover detectives who are sent in to investigate a ‘house of ill-repute’ at Winlaton Mill near Gateshead in Tyne and Wear. Filmed in the filmmaker’s own home the production features as its cast Stephen's work colleagues from the Environmental Heath Department at Gateshead Council. In the doorway of 19 Noel Terrace three young women in suggestive outfits holds the films opening title cards. Title: Max Goldburb Presents… Environmental Vice Featuring… “Taggart” of the Back Yard. Vice Squad 0041987 A man appears in the doorway looking about suspiciously before waving at the camera and tickling one of the women who begins to laugh. A man walking along Noel Terrace changes to a Ford Escort driving up Noel Avenue and coming to an abrupt stop. Inside two undercover detective who point out at Noel Terrace. Parking nearby the two detectives get out of their vehicle making their way along Noel Terrace, both men are wearing sunglasses and attempt not to look suspicious. They stand outside number 19 looking at the cars parked around them and flick through a notebook that one of them is carrying. The two detectives attempt to hide behind a telegraph pole as two young women appear in a window of number 19 with a smile. Another man appears from an alleyway making his way along Noel Terrace towards number 19. He is watched by one of the detectives and passes the second who is hiding behind a newspaper. As he approaches the three young women from the start of the film appear in a window and look down on him suggestively. With a smile on his face, he makes his way to the open front door where one of the women greets him. He offers her his credit card, but she shakes her head. Finding two £10 notes in his pocket he gives them to the woman who tucking them into her bra. She holds up 10 fingers before dragging the man inside closing the door behind her. The three women come out of the back door of the house and places a notice in the window. The man seen in the previous scene stands inside and sticks his thumb up in approval after which the women head back inside. Now sitting on the sofa surrounded by the three women the man smiles with contentment as they touch and caress him. As a fisherman wearing a bright red waterproof and carrying a pole and basket makes his way through a wood he is watched by one of the undercover detectives in a tree. Coming to a stop he sees the notices placed in the window of number 19 that reads ‘French Lessons £5 per Hour.’ With a smile on his face, he approaches the back door and knocks. A second woman appears at the door and he offered her a pack of ‘6 Cod Steaks’ from his basket. With a smile she accepts, and they both go inside with the woman reappearing a few seconds later to place the mans wellington boots on the doorstep. Watching from a greenhouse the two detectives while inside the fisherman sits contentedly on the sofa as the three women sitting closely around him caress and rub his body. Back outside the two detectives make notes from the doorway of the greenhouse. A third man carrying a pint of milk approaches 19 Noel Terrace. As he places the pint on the doorstep, he is pounced on by all three women who drag him kicking inside closing the door behind then. After a moment the man re-appears in a dishevelled state as he attempts to escape but is dragged back inside. As one of the women brings in the milk, she is watched by the two detectives standing behind a nearby wall. A fourth man approaches the house and after knocking on the door is taken inside by all three women. In the living room they rummage through his pockets looking for money. Finding none they throw him out into the street where he is seen by the two detectives who are again standing behind a telegraph pole trying not to be seen. After putting on their sunglasses again the film changes to the man coming back along Noel Terrace carrying a gold piggy bank. At the door one of the women shakes it to see if it contains any money. It does and with a smile she invites him inside. Across the road the two detectives come to kneel behind a car and after a discussion they race across the street and raid the house. The four men featured going into the house suddenly appear at the back door, some in a state on undress, and run away. Remembering his boots the fisherman goes back to put them on before escaping, a bra hanging from the end of his fishing pole. In the living room one of the detectives shows the women his ID while the other takes notes. The women laugh and snatch away the pen and notepad before beginning to attack and undress both men. In the window beside the ‘French Lessons £5 per Hour’ notice other expressions appear ‘Ooh!’ ‘Gasp!’ and ‘Arrgh!’ Without their shoe or trousers, the two detectives are thrown out the back door of the house. As their clothes are thrown after them the two men return to collect them. In the kitchen the women’s pimp, played by Stephen Gray, looks on disappointingly as they give him their earning from the day which includes the gold piggy bank and box of fish steaks. Shaking his head he heads outside to replace the ‘French Lesson’s notice with a new one which reads End title: The End